Evolution

"If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?" - Milton Berle

I believe in evolution. In fact, being a mother for almost eleven years, I have discovered a few transformations within me.

Firstly, my eyes can “see-through” things. I managed to “look through” the books left on the coffee table; the piles of dirty clothes on the floor become transparent to me; I can stare at the walls behind the kids while they are playing tug-of-war. I feel so blessed.

Something happened to my ears too. They can auto-shutdown. When the kids are having a heated argument, the words stopped dead at the tips of my ears. When the kids complain, my ears turn deaf. Whenever my kids ask a question for the zillionth time, still, not once is the question fully registered. Well, to tell the truth, this is one feature that leaves me with mixed feelings. I love the fact that I am able to finish a book amidst a construction worksite. However, I’m losing much control in this auto function and at times, I find myself drifting off during conversations with family members and friends!

The third and the most amazing revolution is that my mouth auto-respond! Well, I really can’t figure out how it works but it goes like this: sometimes my kids posed a question and my mouth will auto-responded without my ears fully registering the inquiry. Then I’d suddenly spot them doing something without my knowledge and question them. They would in turn inform me that I was the one directing them to do so! There are also times when I was actually carrying out a conversation with my kids and much later, I’d have a difficult time trying to figure out what we had actually discussed!

Well, now we know that not all evolutions are good or useful. In my case, it is the beginning of ineffective communications and inadvertently leads to misunderstandings and disputes.

Now, what I’ve got to do is to put in extra effort to fine tune my auto functions.

I need an auto sensor to direct every query and information imposed to me to be stored in an increased memory space bank in my brain. A sorting and filtering function will then be performed and the correct answer will be retrieved from the memory bank and post to my mouth for auto-reply. And whenever the needs arise, I’ll be able to retrieve any required information by a mere search through my brain.

For the time being, let me just stick to my computer.

Oh yes. What were we discussing just now?